Transition Temper Tantrums

Life is always changing - this I know. I'm a sagitarius, we thrive on change - hence why I'm always moving things around in the house. My last blog was done in the summer and I was feeling carefree, in the moment and happy . . . ready to take on whatever life wanted to challenge me with. Well, I love fall - the colors, temperatures and smells but this one has been extremely stressful. Unfortunately I, once again, have turned to food, emotionally eaten my way through it and am now facing my wardrobe each morning wondering what in the hell I am going to wear to work. Halfway through my eating journey I stopped myself, joined a gym and went for 3 weeks after work, relieving stress and losing a smidgen of weight. Until I got sick, then hubby got sick, then the kids and I baled on myself once again and turned to my old habit of food therapy. Needless to say, it is hard to have an optimistic outlook on life feeling so shitty about one self.

After a looooong month off, Jason is back to work at the new restaurant, working 5 nights a week. The kids spent the entire month of September being cared for mostly by Dad - packing lunches, getting the kids off to school, picking them up, etc. Now with him working late nights I am the one doing the majority, rearranging my schedule and adding in my parents for back-up. We are only 1 week into this. Most of the 14 yrs we have been together have been him working nights so there is some familiarity. It just gets harder the older the kids get. I do know it will get easier. I start back at the gym tomorrow which will get me back on track not only physically but especially mentally. The kids have been breaking down, throwing temper tantrums over things I'd never imagine them to. They miss their Daddy, their cats that had to be given away,school started, they've been sick, the full harvest moon, their own bedrooms . . . the list goes on and on. Patience and communication have been our tools (and patience is definitely my best attribute ;P)

Working on myself in turn shows them how to deal with stress in a healthy way - but that is not always something I'm good at.

So life changes have lead to a rocky transition. Miss S wants her Daddy home, her Haley cat back, and to share a bedroom with her brother again. If I can't fix these things then "she is gonna find another home" or "not love me anymore" yet I can't use the bathroom or leave a room without her attached to my hip (I really love the phrase "up my ass" but was trying to sound . . . um . . . nicer?). Mr. B is all over the board. He's throwing tantrums and crying fits over the smallest things -as well as maturing into a little boy that is beginning to worry about looking cool and doing the right thing. Everyone is trying to reassure me that this is all because of the full moon. Could be - maybe on top of transition this is just one big crazy lunar stress disaster?!

With all we've been through it will be nice to settle into some sort of consistent routine that lasts more than a month. I'm hoping the winter will bring that for us. If I can get myself back on track as the organized Matriarch of this household everything else will start to fall into place. We'll pull through, we always do.

Threes

I know when life is smoothing along nicely that pretty soon something has to go wrong. I don't mean this to sound negative - it is to be expected as that is how life rolls. I have a great bumper sticker that is a daily reminder for me "Attitude is the difference between an ordeal and an adventure" Summer around here has been peaceful and fulfilling . . . the sun and 3 days off a week has done wonders for my soul. Not a day goes by that I am not thankful for what I have - two healthy children, a wonderful husband, sweet animals, house, land and an awesome job. I've had plenty of time to enjoy it all this summer and I have finally learned to live in the moment again. Attitude certainly has created a wonderful summer adventure for me.

I have noticed that old saying "things happen in 3's" really rings a bell for us. Our adventures always come in 3's - it's almost predictable. After walking away from a business, holding on by a thread and making it through . . . I know we can do what we put our minds too. Thankfully my past year's experience has led me to become more positive. I have learned to not worry about things that are out of my control - believe me this required a lot of therapy!

Back to the 3s. My husband found out this past week that the restaurant he works for is being sold. It is all a big unknown right now - I'll spare you the details except to say the optimistic outlook says it could be a great opportunity if the new business coming in hires him. We are choosing to not worry and not think negatively about this as that will get us nowhere. So on the way to a meeting with the new Chief of Operations, Jason hits a tire wedge that fell off an oil truck. It punctures holes in his oil pan unbeknownst to him, causing all the oil to drain out and the engine to seize. Broken down on the side of the road the planning via cell phone began, calling triple A, getting a ride home at the end of the night, arranging a place to have the car looked at, calling the oil company said truck belonged to etc. Anyway, long story short the oil company has bent over backwards for him - the car is most likely going to be totaled, they will hand over a check for what it was worth (not much as it is a '99) and have rented him a mighty nice vehicle for his troubles.

I have been a pessamist my whole life and it feels so good to have turned a new leaf. You can't take the pessamism completely out of the girl but you can certainly take the girl out of the pessamism trap. My glass is half full . . . look at all these exciting opportunities ahead of us. New job at a possibly great new restaurant, new car . . . oh wait you say . . . things happen in 3s - what is the third thing. Spin Cycle no longer exists in our washing machine - which is super handy let me tell you. My friend Liz reports her dryer is broken and laundry parties with little ones folding would be awesome. If only we lived closer as I had this wonderful vision of us gabbing and laughing with cocktails while we fold and fill baskets. But alas, living in the boonies puts a nix on that. So I guess it is time to have the repair guy come look at it - maybe it is just a belt or something?

So goodbye to the Accord. What an awesome car - lasted through everything without requiring a ton of attention. She led a good life. Hopefully the 6 yr old washer has a little left in her. Probably all those loads of cloth diapers day in and day out for how many years! She certainly has done her work. And the job . . . I have confidence in my hubby. He is awesome at his job and working beside the new owners for the next month so they will see this. Bring on the next 3 things - we are ready!

The Hen and Cat House

A cat protest is brewing. Two of the three of our cats are now officially outside cats. Wait, you ask . . . why not the third - that is not fair!?! Jazz cat is ancient, he only goes outside to go to the bathroom and occasionally sunbathe in the summer . . . other than that you can find him on his cat bed on the window sill.

SO let me back up a little bit. Our son was tested and is allergic to cats and dogs (among many other things) - go figure as we are the domestic animal capitol of Alna. The best thing we could do is get rid of them all . . . but that is not an option for us . . . . yet. So we are trying a few things before anything drastic has to happen. The dogs are kept downstairs in the house and outside whenever possible - even have an outdoor kennel for them now when we are not home.

My sister and mother suggested we make the kitties outdoor cats - build them a place in the hen house (which is pretty big as it was a former shed). I jumped on it after a tearful night of posting my kitties up for adoption on facebook. My husband is skeptical. He thinks it won't work in the winter. Who knows? He could be right. I asked him to just try it with the promise that if it gets extremely, bitterly below zero cold in the winter and the fleece blankets and heat lamp in the cat room are not enough . . . we can bring them in until it warms up.

I grew up on a farm with outdoor barn cats. I hated them being outside in the winter as a kid. But they had a huge barn full of hay and wool blankets. They were extremely healthy and friendly cats. And I was allergic to cats in my teens so the hair free house was nice. I never in a million years thought I would have outdoor cats. It has been a gut wrenching decision. Obviously my son's health comes first and ultimately if this doesn't work we will have to become animal free or narrow it down more. Right now we had to decide . . . give the cats away or keep them and have them live outside . . . hmmmm. Since it is summer it feels like the right decision - when winter comes will I still feel the same way? I don't know. Can I imagine them living with someone else? no . . .but time will tell me if this isn't working for the cats and then I'll have to step up to the plate to make them happy.

My Dad came over and helped build a cat room in the hen house (okay so he built it and I assisted with finding tools and pointing out where I wanted shelves and hunting for his pencil that he misplaced a zillion times - anytime I spend time with my Dad I am reminded that my forgetfulness clearly comes from him). I put 5 different fleece beds on different levels for them. We put the catdoor halfway up the wall with a shelf under it that connects to the other shelves. It has a shelf outside as well so they can hop down. We thought skunks wouldn't get in this way - they insanely love cat food. There is also a small door for us to go in. I have yet to add a plexiglass windown and paint it.

So back to the cat protest. Last night I put both cats in. Haley freaked and flew out the catdoor which I have propped open. Marley walked around and checked it all out and then left. Enough for one day. Tonight I put dry and wet food on the floor and shoved them both through the catdoor. Haley smelled the wet food right away, jumped down and ate - then left. Marley turned around and walked back out. I sat outside with them both in the yard and pet, rubbed, scratched and loved them as the dogs wrestled and chased each other. I then took a ton of catnip and covered all the beds, the shelves and catdoor with it. Also rubbed some on the shelf outside the catdoor. I ran an extension cord from the hens side and hung a light for them. I then waited. Marley smelled it and slowly came, went through the catdoor and into a bed. Haley smelled it and walked towards the shed, eyeing me the whole time. I stood up she turned to run. I called her and opened the catnip can - a sound she knows all too well. She came running, I held some out for her, picked her up and deposited her into the cat house. I shut the catdoor and left. Two hours later I went out and poked my head in. Neither cat was in there. I walked around to the catdoor and Marley was sitting on the shelf. I picked him up and carried him into the cat house. I sat on the floor and pet him. I talked to him and rubbed under his chin. He laid down and began to purr. Haley then poked her head into the catdoor. She stared at me, I talked to her and she looked around - taking it all in. She walked back out the catdoor and sat on the shelf. Marley then got up and also exited. Enough for one night. I'm satisfied knowing they know it is there if they want it. I'm also expecting some meowing and knocks on the bedroom window tonight.

Turkey Lurkeys

I stopped at Ames Supply to buy dog food and came home with a dozen baby turkeys. We already have a very large hen house for our guinea hens and all the necessary accessories to raise baby birds. What I didn't know because I didn't do any homework before buying these birds on a whim is they don't do well living with other birds. They are prone to blackhead disease - something they get from other birds crap, really. I will spare you the details except to say it is contagious and so far we have lost 4 birds to it and another one is on it's way out.

I love the turkeys. They are super friendly, they let me pet them and follow me around the yard. They sit on the deck by me when I have my coffee, eat mosquitos off my legs, peck at my rings and make little chirping noises. They make me laugh when they run - they remind me of some sort of Star Wars character. They run lopsided with their legs flailing out, but they run fast. They haven't truly learned to fly yet but they flap their wings when they run, legs flapping - sometimes getting a foot or so off the ground. When one does it they all start playing around in the yard, chirping and flapping. But 'cause they are so friendly and want to be around us, their crap is everywhere and it is much messier and bigger than the guineas. For some reason Boston wants to attack the turkeys. He leaves the guineas alone, but the turkeys would be dinner in a second for him. This has also presented a problem as Boston is a 9 month old puppy who still has to be watched in the yard. When the turkeys are out he cannot run loose - it has become a total pain in the ass. It's a waiting game at this point. In Jason's mind he's wondering if we will be having all the turkey dishes he has named Forest Gump style. In my mind I'm hoping one little buddy lives to sit on the deck and have coffee with.

embracing chaos

Our days usually entail at least one crazy chaotic moment at our homestead - I mean with my gracefulness, two little kids and all of our animals, stories just happen.

Our animals personality quirks are what make them fun and yes, sometimes annoying. But even the behavior that makes you gasp when you walk in the door after a long day at work with 12 bags of groceries and two whiney melting down kids is eventually funny and a good story. Ramsey dog is usually the main character in these stories (although Boston is swiftly gaining noteriety in his role as supporting actor). Ramsey Girl steals food off the shelves - such as 5lbs of flour or a tub of shortening - things you just can't sweep up. Riley sleeps in my flower garden, Boston chases the turkeys and gnaws on the window sill. They keep life interesting.

Recently the kids accidentally let Boston out who chased and caught a turkey, was wrestled to the ground by me- adding massive bruises to accompany the massive purple one on my ass from stopping short on my bike behind Juliet, not getting my feet out of the cages fast enough and falling over on the side of the road of downtown Hallowell. Quite fricken funny, really. The kids also recently discovered that Jazz Cat likes people food (okay I may have shown them) and feed him bits of their grilled cheese, crabcakes or pizza. Jazz caught on fast. We created a monster.

The story that prompted this blog happened this past weekend. It was hysterically funny. Probably one of those "you had to be there" moments but nevertheless worth mentioning.

Out of the corner of my eye a black thing jumped in the air, I heard the squeal and stared towards the door. Jason stopped in his tracks and turned to see what the noise was. Boston was jumping and spinning . . . then we saw his head and realized he wasn't playing. "HIS HEAD" I yelled. Jason darted towards him as Boston spun himself to the top of the entryway stairs with a giant blue Jolly Ball on his head, crashed into the metal water bowl and fumbled his way down the set of 4 brick stairs. He did not stop there and banged into the wall, jumping backwards, breathing heavy and squealing inside the ball. Jason talked to him and put his hands on him, he jumped back again hitting the table and chairs. Holding him down, he pulled the ball off to reveal the shear look of terror, the panting and staring at the giant blue ball that used to be one of his favorite toys - until he chewed a giant hole in it. Now he has a red one. And he's afraid of the water bowl.

Animals, Animals Everywhere

In order for my stories to make complete sense, you have to have some understanding of all the Stone family animals. Without going completely overboard in describing all the characters I will give a little blurb on everyone so you are up to date when I post my stories.

Our enteurage of pets adds so much to our lives, both good and bad - and we wouldn't have it any other way. In fact if I had the time or money I would have many, many more. Including goats . . don't you worry I will have some down the road for sure.

First we will start with Jazz. Jazz, Jazz Cat, Jazzy, Jazzters, Mrow Mrows (you will note this ongoing trend of all our animals having more than just their given name). We think Jazz is about 16 yrs old. He is a big black and white boy and was named Jasmine until we noticed many months later he had a penis. He came to live with us on Southport Island the year we got married (1998). An abandoned stray lured by salmon, his scrappy attitude has been calmed and his senior citizen presence melts our hearts. But beware - he will let you know if he doesn't like something and does not put up with bullshit of any kind. He can smell a hotdog cooking a mile away and will sit by the main water bowl for hours, even if it is full, 'cause he only likes fresh water . . . and he will stare at you until you do it. The minute you get up from the kitchen table he will steal your chair, over and over again.

Next in line for kitties is Marley. Marley, Marman, Mar, Marley Mrows was born to an outdoor mama cat at a farm up north (step-mother-in-law's family farm) He came to us as a little black fluffball that spent his first winter indoors climbing wall hangings and scratching our living room chair. Marman thinks he is one of our dogs. He lies with them, goes in & out with them and will even eat their food. He sleeps on the roof of the house, hunts daily - even carrying the rodent onto the roof to greet me in the upstairs bathroom window - and always comes when called in hopes of loving or food. Marley is named after Bob Marley - you pick either the comedian or the singer 'cause we love them both. I have to make sure he is inside when I take the dogs for a walk as he will follow us and meow loudly the entire time.

Last of the kitties is Haley. Haley is an odd bird and come to think of it she doesn't really have any nicknames, just Haley. Haley is the result of me not being able to say no. On our way into the vet a woman thrust a carrier at me and said "do you want a cat, my daughter is allergic - she's fixed, up to date on shots and is from the shelter" uh . . .uh . . . uh, well my girlfriend is looking for a kitten (omg my husband is going to kill me). Upon arriving home a phone call to said girlfriend let me know she already found a kitten that day . . . shit. "Can we keep her?" I was asked over and over again. So we did, much to hubby's dismay. She hates him and he hates her - they stay out of each others way and it's all good, lol. She is definitely my cat - she is skittish with everyone but me, will only come when I call her. She sleeps on the bed right near me and absolutely LOVES to have her belly rubbed all the time.

Now for the dogs. While I am an animal lover of every kind . . . dogs are my absolute favorite and I would love to have a shelter or kennel or something - except for I will never, ever, ever own my own business again . . . SO . . . Those of you that have known us for awhile know we have had many dogs during our marriage, long before we had kids our dogs were our kids. Unfortunately we have experienced some tragic losses with our former babies - prostate cancer, kidney disease and an entangled tumor in the nerve system, as well as one little biter that didn't work with the kids we had to find a home for (btw he is doing just fine as an only dog w/an older couple not too far down the road from us).

Riley is the alpha dog of our current clan. Riley, Riley Boo, Riley Boo Bear, Boo, Boo Bear, Ry, Ry Guy, Baby Boy, Riley Boy is the most amazing dog I have ever had. He is a mastiff, rottie, lab mix that we got at the Alna Store. (Nothing like going in for milk and reserving a puppy - and THIS time it was hubby). Boo Bear is 150lbs - he is HUGE and nothing but pure lovebug. He is 8 yrs old. He loves to snuggle and lets the kids lie all over him. He nuzzles the cats, steals the hen's eggs and would rather be outside than in. He is the only dog that sleeps upstairs - even figuring out how to open the gate at the bottom of the stairs to climb to his comfy bed in our room at night. (The other dogs have never asked to sleep upstairs - we don't give preferential treatment on purpose). Swimming is his favorite but he refuses to take a bath (have you ever tried getting a 150lb dog into a tub that doesn't want to go?), his head hits the roof of the car, he can open the screen door to let himself out, he can sit pretty for a treat and I love being greeted by him galloping down the driveway slightly sideways when I come home.

Ramsey, Ramsey Girl, Ramsters, Rams, Baby Girl came to live with us 3 yrs ago. We adopted her from the animal shelter when our last buddy, Cooper passed away leaving Riley as our only dog. We checked out the dogs, narrowed it down, brought Riley with us to meet them - he and Ramsey hit it off and we took her home. Ramsey was born at the shelter (they say she is a Great Dane/Shepherd Mix but not so sure about that), adopted out for a year and then returned by the woman whose new boyfriend didn't like her. If I had to guess I would say there was some abuse that happened. She then spent the next 8 months living at the shelter until we came along. She definitely has her issues, which over the years we have worked on - the only one we haven't been able to change is her food issues; she eats like a starving pig and will steal food if at all possible (from shelves, table, other animals, the kids, etc.). I thought for sure Ramsters had to have Ridgeback in her 'cause of how her hair stands up on her back a bit, her coloring and 'cause she has SO MUCH ENERGY she could run forever. Five mile rollerblading stints are her favorite. She used to roam and disappeared on us one night, injurying herself, leading to ACL surgery, complications and ultimately 6 months laid up in the house going stir crazy. She since has become a bit overweight but no longer roams and thanks to our new puppy is getting her energy out by playing all the time. As crazy as she has been, I love her to pieces and she is so gentle with our kids and other animals.

Boston is our newest member of the family. We've had him 1 1/2 months and so far he is known as Boston, Boston Boy, Bud, Buddy Boy and Cutie Pie. We took him in from a loving family that couldn't keep him anymore after adopting him from an animal shelter. He is an American Pit Bull Terrier mix, looks like he is wearing a tuxedo and is a total piss and vinegar sweetheart. He is the best thing we could have done for our other two dogs. He and Ramsey have become wrestling/chase buddies (letting the old guy off the hook when he doesn't want to play). He snuggles, snorts like a pig, doesn't understand that Marley doesn't like to wrestle (all the cats are used to him now - thank goodness!) gets into all kinds of puppy mischief (including stealing the hermit crabs to play with and chewing my bras in half) and is keeping us on our toes. He doesn't like water, but loves to play fetch which is awesome as the other two could care less about it. He is super friendly and at 45lbs is a great size for the kids. AND he has broken hubby's "no dogs on the couch" rule with a little help from his Mama.

Hamilton and Sidestep are our hermit crabs. They don't require a lot which is nice but they are amusing. They change their shells, climb and bathe in their pool. Hamilton is the big guy and very outgoing. Sidestep is very shy and passive. At nighttime I let them out to "romp" in a large plastic tote to get their exercise. The dogs are very intrigued and I've learned my lesson the hard way to keep a better eye on them.

Lastly we have our guinea hens. Currently we have 16. Two years ago we started out with 16 and the numbers have gone up and down so many times between being eaten (by coyotes and other wildlife, not us) and hatching babies. We have them for natural tick control - and I do belive they work. They roam free around our property eating bugs, returning to their building at the end of the day. They are fun to watch, very strange looking birds. Some people hate their loud screeching, I will admit sometimes it does get annoying but they are better watch-dogs than the dogs, announcing arrivals and passer-bys at the top of their lungs. And yes they do shit around the yard which is kinda gross but even grosser and helpful is the dogs eat the hen shit so we have an automatic clean-up system. Just don't let the dogs kiss you if you come over ;)

The funny thing about having all these animals is the reaction from my parents. Now mind you, I grew up on a farm. Horses, goats, bunnies, barn cats and a dog plus many, many hamsters, gerbils, chameleons and a guinea pig. My first animal of my very own after leaving my parents was my white German Shepherd mix from Jason for my 23rd birthday. We already had a dog, Ziggy that was Jason's. My parents reaction "great, just what you need" And for the 14 years we have been together the reactions for every animal have been similar "oh, another one?" "Tell me it's not yours" "Why?" This last time I looked at them and said "You raised me with animals, you have been witnessing this love for how many years and your still surprised?" I can't wait to see their reaction when I get my goats.

Fish Market? What Fish Market?

So Lobster Lady's blog is gone *poof*. . . . she has been replaced by Lady KiKi (family nickname) . . . . I'd honestly forgotten I even had a blog. It was a fun thing to do on the side as a way to get my frustrations out from working with the public. SO thankful that part of our life is OVER. I am happy and relieved to not have to spend the summer waiting on wealthy-know-it-all tourists with major attitudes while busting my butt to run a business and be a mother of two young kids. THIS summer is going to be amazing . . . 3 day weekends with my kids, beach days, enjoying the outdoors, hanging at our crazy abode . . . and it is all sure to bring many humorous tales to share . . . .and here is where I'll do that. Bye-bye to "Words from the fish lady" and hello to "Tales of the Family Stone."